She's not a magic lamp!

Ok, I will just start it out just like this.....why do people always rub on my pregnant wifes belly?
Why? Why? really...Why? Don't get me wrong family members don't bother us , really they don't, I'm serious. What I want to know, who gave the blue haired crow in the grocery store permission to walk up to my wife and start caressing her like she was a magical lamp and a genie was gonna pop out if she kept rubbing long enough. Listen lady just because you had kids 67 years ago, doesn't give you the right to rub my wife like a professional lotion applier! You don't see old men coming up to my rubbing my parts because we both pee standing up! It doesn't matter that you are both women, both have given birth, or even have the same astrological sign! Keep your hands of the belly! Other than that everything is hunky-dorey (wow that looks funny typed out). Well, about nine more weeks till delivery time so keep counting down with me!

Late,
Ryan
daddyinc@gmail.com

F.U.V

Is it a "van", a "school bus", an "extended-cab car", or just the old reliable term "mini-van"? I really don't like this term. So I have come up with a new term.....FUV! Yes, a Family Utility Vehicle.....huh...huh..yeah...you like that huh? I want to tell you, this FUV that we just purchased a month ago is totally sweet! I mean we had a Ford Aerostar when I was growing up and God love my father, he was just getting what was family-functional at the time. But, I must say it was really fun even though my mom Hated that thing! I must say though, our new vehicle is so friggin sweet!
We bought a 2008 Honda Odyssey and man this thing has eeeeeeevvverything! Not to mention it is totally 100% my wifes vehicle. I have only driven this thing like a true handful of times. Back in the day with our other vehicle I used to have to drive every place we went, but now I am always the passenger and that is okay with me! Number one question though what and when made the "mini-van" un-cool? I'm serious I really want to know the answer or opinions on this topic!

Late,

Ryan
daddyinc@gmail.com

No, I am not dead....just ...well...I've been...STOP LOOKING AT ME LIKE THAT!

I know It has been well over a year since my last post. I have been on a "finding myself outside of the internet world" journey. So, you will start getting regular posts again to let everyone know what the heck is going on in my ordinary world! Quick run-through......I turned 28, Taylor will be 5 soon, Rylan just turned 2 and has an amazing Mohawk, Crystal the WW (Wonderful Wife) is still as breathtaking as ever.....although I bet the little one in her tummy wasn't taking all of her breath from her! Yes that's right, number three is on the way! In any event, like I said earlier I will be back posting rants, thoughts tips, tricks, political views, religious views, and reviews of stuff I like and dislike! So hang on true believers....more to come!

Also, please check out my wifes new website, devoted to carrying all you need to pamper your precious pet. You can find her site at www.pawprintpalace.com

Late,
Ryan

Yes......It's been awhile

Ok ok ok ok ok! I know it has almost been two months since my last post, but MAN! Vacation, Halloween, Thankgiving. It has been crazy to say the least. First off, we went on a cruise to Mexico with the kids and my In-laws and that was a blast. It was the first time that I have had off since my son was born in February. For Halloween the kids dressed up as Supergirl and Superboy! They looked totally awesome! Fast-forward to Thanksgiving, it was pretty much the norm besides that I actually took off this year and did not have to work like the lat like 9 years. Well, more to come soon I promise..........seriously.....no really......I mean it!

"Would you like some French Fries with that Whine?"

Today I thought that there was an emergency down the road such as a fire or person needing medical attention so they were sending half of the city to the help them. Oh...wait...THOSE WERE MY CHILDREN WHINING! Taylor was like an ambulance whining around the house for no reason, talking about how every part of the house that we asked her to go put something up at was "to daaaaark". Also, if I got out of the lines of her coloring book, she would not stop whining about it. Rylan was like a fire truck, barraging aroung the house with his three point crawl, and getting extremely pissed off when he could not pull up on something, so he would fire up his loud mouthed siren. Anyways, if you come to my house, bring your earmuffs and watch out for emergency vehicular/children hybrids coming your way. By the way remember you never know who is watching your every move. I want to start something out periodicaly when I find something sweet on the great Interweb. So here ya go!

"I always feel like, somebody's watchin' me!"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KScuosn2WqY

Ryan,

daddyinc@gmail.com

She Loves Me, She Freakin' Loves Me Not!!!!!

Ah yes the ole teenage years. When your son or daughter exclaims at the top of there tweeny little lungs " I don't love you anymore!". Yep, just one thing though, my daughter is fricken three years old! What the hell??? She comes home after going to my In-laws for the whole weekend, which lemme stop here. I really do not like her going over there Friday night through Sunday night. First off, I feel it is a privilege for her to go over there and have a good time if she has been good throughout the week, not that spending her time with her grandparents is a privilege, but getting away and staying over there and eating, drinking, staying up late, and watching what she wants the whole weekend is. Also I feel that when she goes over there and does what she feels or wants, it "undoes" what we strive to teach and instill in here throughout the week. And most of all, I work all week, my weekends are sacred to me and it is one of the biggest reasons I got this job is a great work schedule with weekends off. I wish so much that we could have a normal weekend of getting up watching saturday morning cartoons, going out and doing stuff together like: going to a park, a petting zoo, the zoo, shopping, build a bear, or something worthwhile, you know "the stuff that memories are made of". I can't remember the last time she was here on a weekend.....And I truly miss that, and I think its time for a change. Anyways back on the whole thing this came from. My daughter keeps telling me out of the blue " I don't love you daddy" and when I tell her I love her she says "No you don't". Then she goes on to say that she loves all of these other people except me! What the hell? She's like "I love Mommy, Nana, Papa, Uncle J, Channie, Grampie, Jen-Jen, the Dogs, Dora, The Backyardigans, President Bush, The astronauts of the last trip to space......." WHERE THE HELL AM I?????????? Crystal says its just a phase and she'd screwing with me, but dang, I just keep thinking...this kid IS going to be a teen one day....and I will be going premature grey! Anyways, please let me know what you all think and if either of these two instances have happened to you and what you did to deal with them.

And remember, make memories everyday.

Ryan
daddyinc@gmail.com

Sacrificial Laptop

As of late Sunday I offered my laptop to the computing gods as an offering......ok thats a lie, the damn thing just died! Thats why it's been 4 days since my last post. So sorry if anyone actually reads this. This past weekend some of my wife's family came into town to stay with my in-laws after just getting over some sort of cold or snotty something..........should I say more? I am kind of a germ freak. Anyways, I will be back in a couple of days once I get the other laptop set uo(like anyone reads or cares about this blog).